I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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