the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
