He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
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