Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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