Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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