so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize