I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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