Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
