Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize