I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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