We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Randomize