ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
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