just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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