Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize