I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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