I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
