Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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