You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
