I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize