cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Randomize
