that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Randomize
