Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
