I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
