sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
he fucked my hip out of place.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Randomize
