if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Randomize
