Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
it was like having sex with a tree stump
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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