Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
