After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize
