This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
Just high enough for therapy.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
