Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
