You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
It's shark week go big or go home
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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