i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
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