Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
