So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
