Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize