Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
