Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
