i used baking grease as lip gloss
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
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