"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
