New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
