THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
