My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
