He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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