She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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