I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Randomize
