just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
