listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Fuck me I smell like cheese
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
