There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Randomize
