No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
