R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
